As I’m sure you’re aware, Valentine’s Day is approaching. I like Valentine’s Day. But disliking Valentine’s Day seems to be a Thing.
One reason I’ve heard is that people try to use the day to “fix” relationships that are unhealthy. They think that giving their significant other flowers and chocolate because that’s the thing to do will make up for all the times they’ve been selfish or unkind or whatever. It’s a very shallow viewpoint.
Some people do that, sure. But that doesn’t have to be how Valentine’s Day works.
If a relationship already has problems, one day of flowers and chocolate isn’t going to fix it. But it could be one step in the right direction if the couple is trying to make things better. And even healthy relationships – romantic or not – need constant upkeep to stay healthy.
Valentine’s Day is a tool (though that’s an exceedingly unromantic description). Like any event where the social norm is to give gifts or get together with special people, really. By itself, it’s not enough to fix something that’s broken. But if it is used in connection with other relationship-building and -sustaining tools, it can be useful and wonderful.