Posted in College, Life

The End – Ish

Without education, we are in a horrible and deadly danger of taking educated people seriously. – G. K. Chesterton

So. This is my very last week of college classes. Possibly ever. I am very much okay with this. I’m not going to say I’ll never go back to school. It could happen. But it is not in my immediate plans. I can’t take any more at the moment.

Actually, I’ve been ready to be done since my sophomore year. I liked my first year of college. I’m not sure what happened over that summer, but by the time August rolled around, I didn’t want to go back. That semester was lousy. Each one since then has been a little better, but I’ve still been eager to be finished.

It’s still a little odd. School in some form has been part of my life since preschool. Deciding what to do with myself without that in the picture is odd.

There’s also the factor that, until very recently, I never seriously believed I would graduate college without being in some sort of serious relationship. Probably engaged. Well. That didn’t happen. Frankly, I’m disappointed. More frankly, I’m really disappointed. I wasn’t supposed to be making big life decisions just for myself. I guess God had other ideas. I’m trying to be patient. With limited success.

But anyway. Even though I haven’t really liked college, I have learned things. There was a cool moment at some point earlier this year where someone asked me something related to psychology, which has been one of my focuses. It was a piece of knowledge I thought of as normal, but I realized, “Oh! The entire world doesn’t know this!”

Still. There are things I’ve learned throughout college that have had little or nothing to do with my classes. One of the most useful is the realization that somehow, everything gets done. I may be exhausted, but it somehow happens.

I’ve learned things about myself. I’m smart. Which I always kind of knew, but when you’re the top and bottom of your one-person class you sometimes wonder, “But in comparison to other people…?” I’m funny. When I’m comfortable enough to say the things that pop into my head, anyway. I am not one of those intimidating people who seem to thrive on having something they must be doing every second.

Through these three and a half years, I’ve been honing the fiction-writing talents I do seem to possess. No thanks to my creative writing teacher. (Least favorite class. By far. I learned almost nothing. And probably the worst moment of my college career happened in that class.) But I’ve been practicing. And I have a short story that I want to polish up and submit to some contests.

I do like my school. And I’ve had my favorite teacher every semester. And I will miss chapel. And God has somehow always made sure I had a friend here with whom I could do things like eat lunch.

I have five classes left. Next week, my tremendously dear friend Maria is finally going to get to come visit me at school. (The wisest way to spend finals week? Probably not. I don’t care.) Tuesday night, we’re going to the midnight premiere of the last Hobbit movie. Then Wednesday afternoon, I have my very last final, with my favorite teacher. It seems like a fitting ending.

This post has been very rambling. I apologize. I shall leave you with my favorite of the songs I’ve learned in chapel.


5 thoughts on “The End – Ish

  1. I’m very happy for you, and glad, too, that you’ve done so well. You’ve come a long way in a short three years and three months. Way to go! (The Chesterton quote is a funny one.)

    Uncle Tom

  2. You did it! So proud of how you stuck it out. I’m looking forward to spending some time together. I’m glad you figured out the fact that you are smart. You should have asked me. I’d have told you that. Don’t worry about not being engaged yet. The right person in God’s time will be worth the wait. You aren’t only smart, but wise. Love you Zella, Aunt Nancy

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